In less than 48 hours, i’ll be on my way to JFK international airport and making my way to UK. I’ll leave this quiet town, this comfy and clean house where i called home for the past few weeks. Isn’t is amazing how we meet different people in life at the most strangest place, and then they become part of our lives. I wonder, if my photographer from D.C. didn’t cancel my shoot, and if i didn’t make it back to South Jersey, and didn’t follow Alex to Canada, will our relationship be that strong? Or it’ll be a very sweet memory of the typical summer fling. I may meet him in Asia or when he relocates to Singapore and we may hang out together again? I guess i’ll never know. But i do know that if we both hang in there and make this relationship work, he will be the last man i ever date.
You know the excitement when you are getting ready to leave a place and head to the next destination, i don’t feel that way. Im so not ready to leave, i feel that my life is already here. I wake up seeing the guy of my dreams next to me, it feels amazing. I cannot imagine life without him. I see myself cooking dinner for him everyday when he comes home and before i go to work, as a bartender at night, going hiking and rock climbing with him on Sundays, gym on every other day. It just seems so beautiful.
It’s so crazy, i never thought i’ll meet someone i actually really like, so much, with the same hobbies, and aspiration, with great communication between us. I adore this guy so much. I just feel so loss, restless, and empty, knowing that i won’t see him for the next few days, weeks, might be even months. I will miss him very very much.